Lights! Camera! Action!
By Jeff Salter
I would NEVER be on what is termed “reality” TV — where I believe (generally) untalented people are placed in preposterous situations (that viewers are supposed to believe are “real”) and then fed lines of dialog. To me these represent the death of whatever was (once upon a time) good about network television programming.
If I were a key figure in a television show, what kind of program would it be? That’s our theme this week and my answer appeared like a bolt of lightning.
Remember that old 1950s TV series where the bewildered husband monitors all the craziness around him and his household and then makes wry comments to the audience? Yeah, the Burns and Allen Show.
Here’s a link to a 1952 episode:
https://archive.org/details/georgeburnsandgracieallen
After a lengthy commercial and an opening scene between Gracie and Blanche, George appears (to address the audience) at about the 5:19 mark.
Here’s a link to their pilot episode in 1950, but it has a very slow, long (UN-funny) intro. Doesn’t really get started until about the 5:21 mark.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Ae41wbhp7o
Evidently George had to explain to TV viewers how this video format show would differ from their popular radio shows.
And here’s some extensive info about the Burns and Allen team, including some nice detail about their TV series:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Burns_and_Allen
I share these with you so you can get a grasp of how George Burns broke the “fourth wall” by stepping aside to address the audience, but remaining in character. It fascinated me even as a kid, long before I realized how unusual it was. Later in the series, George would view a scene (typically occurring with Gracie in their home) on the TV set in his upstairs study… and then comment on it to the audience.
Here’s a snip about that fourth wall:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/4th_wall
Sometimes I feel like George… staying in the character of me (Jeff) but stepping aside from the craziness and breaking that fourth wall to address the audience.
So… if I were ever in a TV show, I think it would be similar to Burns & Allen — though hopefully not as grainy and presumably not in B&W.
Question:
What kind of TV show would YOU likely be featured in? Got a title for it?
Angela Schroeder
Patricia Kiyono
Elaine Cantrell
Jeff Salter
Joselyn
Tonette Joyce
Four Foxes, One Hound 
I despise reality TV. But if I had to be on one, it would have to be a game show…where I win…lots of tax-free money. And maybe a boat. And an all-expense paid trip to tour Italy. We’ll call it, Jennifer’s Wheel of Fortune.
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I think you’d be great on a TV game show, Jenn. However, I recommend you call it: “Jenn’s Walk the Plank”
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Buit that sounds like I might not win…. There must be no doubt! HAHA!
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Oh, I was picturing you as the hostess, Jenn!
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Oh,Jeff, that would be PERFECT for you! I can see you handling it, ala George Burns! What a great talent he was.
I agree about reality shows. There is no way anyone is going to act naturally when they know there is a camera on them. And the more I hear of the phoniness, the more I wonder why in heck anyone watches them. Once the conversations starts on one,I am out of the room,(at least,mentally).
I getter get cracking on something for tomorrow.
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Definitely agree that Geo Burns was a fantastic comedian. All the more interesting to me that he repeatedly credited — at least publicly — Gracie as the comic of that duo.
The wiki article was fascinating. I did not realize, for ex., that when they first began working together, Gracie was the “straight man”.
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Great post Jeff! If I had to choose a TV show for me it would probably be one of those human drama shows or a true crime show. I like both of those types! 🙂
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great to see you here, Lisa.
In your true crime drama, which character would you be? the D.A.? or the investigator? Or the closer?
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Jeff, I’d be the investigator! 😉 A Super Spy all the way! 🙂
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Yes, I should have already known that, Lisa!
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I’ve never seen that! Somehow, it does seem perfect for you!
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some of their shows were truly hilarious, but some were fairly ordinary. The best ones were when she went shopping.
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I read this and meant to comment earlier but totally got distracted. I watched and loved the Burns and Allen episode. But then, it was over and other suggested shows popped on the screen. I was intrigued by a show titled, “What’s My Line?” I’d never seen that one before. Love. It. I laughed so hard! And honestly I think that would be a show for me to be on. I would be a panelist asking all the questions trying to figure out what people do or who they were. 🙂
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I used to watch that show! I was always amazed when one (or more) of the panel could guess the line of work by the few questions they’d get to ask. And I even remember a few times when one of the panel would recuse him/her self because they apparently already knew the contestant.
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I couldn’t agree more with you re the reality shows … and there are just thousands ! I mean, really, do we have to watch what can go wrong with tattoos? Or snoop in peoples private lives? Ridiculous. Over the summer we don’t have the telly on much, so it’s okay, but It’s frustrating to having to control what the girls can watch at a “family time tv hour”
As for Burns & Allen – Never heard of them but then again, that was way before my time. Hubby knows about the program, but never seen it either. Will check the links over the weekend when I feel a bit better.
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total agreement, Iris. My only hope is that American TV programming will finally realize they’ve passed the saturation point on “reality” TV and go back to normal scripted series in the genres we’re accustomed to: drama, detective, comedy, etc. Of course, my personal favorites are documentaries and for those I really love the History Channel.
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Hey! I watched the first link you provided for the Burns & Allen show. I was funny! this is the first time I’ve ever seen the show! Too bad programming has gotten to be so bad. Comedians don’t seem to think they can be funny any more without being obscene and obnoxious! I like he good old days of TV (that happened before me, of course) 😉 With your great sense of humor, I see no problem with you being in a show like George and Gracie! When can I watch the first episode??
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LOL. I’m still looking for sponsors!
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