I have found lots of ‘Friends’ on Facebook. Many of the people are fantastic. Some of the biggest names in publishing today interact with me and are truly ‘friendly’. In fact, I interact with some of the famous people more often than some of my relatives, old friends and not-famous friends.
I have an eclectic group on my main FB page, though I only keep around well-intentioned people. There is no way for me to agree with everything everyone says, even though I am a Gemini on the Cancer cusp Even with all that going on in my head, there is no way for me to be mentally split-up enough to agree with the diverse ideas that crop up.
I have found good/great writers, great interviews, great advice, good books and wonderful interviewees by friending writers and accepting their friends’ ‘friend requests’. My net gets cast wider and wider, but when and how to stop?
The Facebook page where I spend most of my time and interest is under this name, my writing name, my maiden name. I have another FB page under my married name, for the local ‘People Collectors’, as I call them. “Are you on Facebook? I’ll friend you”-types, even if their kid was two years behind my grandson in Cub Scouts and I didn’t know the woman at all. And now just about every person who worked with or near me at one place has decided to friend me whether they were friendly to me when worked there or not, and most of those who were not suddenly want to be ‘friends’, (then they often don’t answer my comments!)
There are a few on that page from long ago with whom l have nothing in common. Their lives are not great and I haven’t the heart to ‘unfriend’ them, even though we seldom interact. Then we have my highly critical son and assorted ex-in-laws on that page, as well. If someone I knew previously finds me and I think that they will get along on my main page, I invite them to friend me over there.
That wasn’t a real digression; my question is about people who may want to ‘collect me’ because I am a writer or I know other writers.
Do you get requests from them?
Do you accept them all?
Many writers accept any friend request because it broadens their fan base.
I am hardly in that position.
I have been burned by non-writing Friends-of-Friends, who latched onto a writer because they thought their work was on the steamier side and, well, you can imagine how THOSE went. Now, I have been checking on those who send me requests, and if I think that they are hangers-on, I really don’t usually answer those.
Maybe I am not being fair; I have even deleted some request by mistake.
NOTE: I am NOT talking about ‘spam’ request, many with the phony military pictures. I delete and report them as SPAM immediately. I am talking about some “Friends of Friends”, which is the outgoing setting for most of my posts. Some of the best people that I have come to know started out as ‘friends of friends’; many of you reading this befriended me this way and I embrace you.
I am, however, talking about ‘hangers-on’; people collectors who want to hobnob with the famous and those around them. People who have no interest in writing , but read, say one particular romance writer, and think that anyone who is interested in her needs to be their ‘friend’, (even if I never read the works of that nice person who is the famous writer).
I never expected to have (as of this writing) 251 ‘friends’; I almost quit at 100! I am so glad that I didn’t. I see everything from the greatest books, the funniest memes, the most touching tales, laugh-out-loud anecdotes, the prettiest scenes, pets, poems, recipes, you-name-it. I pray with people, share their joys, learn new things, watch other people’s kids and grandkids grow, celebrate their milestones, offer condolences for their woes.
But how many people on a page, with whom one has nothing in common, are too many? Again, I do not feel that I am in a position to have a ‘Writer’s/Author’s Page’, at least, not yet. I hate to miss new, great people, especially writers with whom I have good rapport. However, by choices of FB, I only see a portion of posts, as people only see a portion of mine.
But now I think that I have been unfair to ‘writer collectors’.
Maybe I should see them as I see them as ‘potential fans’.
Maybe I should see them as ‘potential friends’.
What do you think SPECIFICALLY of ‘Writer Groupies’?