What Was I Doing In That Pub?

And Why Didn’t I Remember My Exciting Adventure in Annie’s Pub?

By Jeff Salter

This’ll be a long ride (from 2015), so hang on!
I was frantically pulling together my tax material (from 7 a.m. to 3 p.m. almost non-stop) yesterday, so I could tote it over to my wonderful CPA.
Ran out of time and couldn’t go thru all the credit card statements… until today.
Found a payment for $29.97 on Feb. 12 to “Annie’s Pub“.
“Well,” I said to myself, “I wonder if I had a good time at Annie’s Pub?”

english-pub-2

This is how I imagined Annie’s Pub.

Of course, I had no recollection whatsoever of either Annie or her Pub. But I began stressing about that $30 and wondered what I had to show for it.
There was an 800 number listed on the statement, so I calculated how I could phrase my question if I managed to get Annie on the phone.
“Annie, can you tell me what I spent $30 on, when I was with you in February?”
No, too direct.
“Annie, can you tell me what product or service you provide?”
No, too vague.
So I decided not to call Annie until I had a witness (in 2015, Denise was honky-tonking in Pigeon Forge).
Then I got to thinking…
“Annie, Annie. Annie… who do I know named Annie?”
Nobody.
Then through a series of mental gymnastics, it came to me!
Annie runs a subscription service!
No, not that kind of subscription.
This is for a magazine called “Good Old Days” — quite good, BTW. Lots of articles about the generation before mine, and (of course) my own generation. How different things were in those days, etc.
It will take another complete post to explain why I had to call Annie in February, and how she suckered me into adding three more years to my subscription… when it was already extended through mid 2017.
But I wanted to let y’all know that Annie’s Pub is “legit”.
Annie’s Pub is an abbreviation of Annie’s Publications. Go figure.

Post Script

So I called Annie back today and asked her not to keep sending me renewal notices when I already have a subscription through June 2020.
She said she’d take me off the list.
I said, “I want to keep getting the magazine… just stop sending me “reminders” to renew, like the subscription is about to run out.”
“Okay, I’ll take you off the list,” replied Annie.
“But you will keep sending my magazine, right?”
Heavy sigh from Annie.

Question:
Have you ever seen something on a credit bill that totally threw you?

[JLS # 482]

About Jeff Salter

Currently writing romantic comedy, screwball comedy, and romantic suspense. Fourteen completed novels and four completed novellas. Working with three royalty publishers: Clean Reads, Dingbat Publishing, & TouchPoint Press/Romance. "Cowboy Out of Time" -- Apr. 2019 /// "Double Down Trouble" -- June 2018 /// "Not Easy Being Android" -- Feb. 2018 /// "Size Matters" -- Oct. 2016 /// "The Duchess of Earl" -- Jul. 2016 /// "Stuck on Cloud Eight" -- Nov. 2015 /// "Pleased to Meet Me" (novella) -- Oct. 2015 /// "One Simple Favor" (novella) -- May 2015 /// "The Ghostess & MISTER Muir" -- Oct. 2014 /// "Scratching the Seven-Month Itch" -- Sept. 2014 /// "Hid Wounded Reb" -- Aug. 2014 /// "Don't Bet On It" (novella) -- April 2014 /// "Curing the Uncommon Man-Cold -- Dec. 2013 /// "Echo Taps" (novella) -- June 2013 /// "Called To Arms Again" -- (a tribute to the greatest generation) -- May 2013 /// "Rescued By That New Guy in Town" -- Oct. 2012 /// "The Overnighter's Secrets" -- May 2012 /// Co-authored two non-fiction books about librarianship (with a royalty publisher), a chapter in another book, and an article in a specialty encyclopedia. Plus several library-related articles and reviews. Also published some 120 poems, about 150 bylined newspaper articles, and some 100 bylined photos. Worked about 30 years in librarianship. Formerly newspaper editor and photo-journalist. Decorated veteran of U.S. Air Force (including a remote ‘tour’ of duty in the Arctic … at Thule AB in N.W. Greenland). Married; father of two; grandfather of six.
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30 Responses to What Was I Doing In That Pub?

  1. Too funny, Jeff! If I were your wife, you
    d have some ‘splainin’ to do!
    I get that from a magazine I have subscribed to for the last decade, constant “This may be your last issue” ‘reminders’.
    Drives me bonkers.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Jeff Salter says:

      I finally had to set up a list on a ledger sheet.
      title, last renewal, term of subscription, and ending date.
      Then, when I’d get those urgent “reminders” from the magazine, I’d just check my list and see that I had 3 years left and shred the reminder.

      Like

  2. Debbie Bailey says:

    Gary finds them a lot. Then the usual question comes, ” Deb, where did you go or what did you buy from _———–? ” (fill in the blank) I look at the credit record, I look at my calendar, I look in my tablet for any record of something I bought; nothing shows 99 out of 100 times. I try to figure out the enigmatic clues they give you for a name of the “store”. Yes, Gary is the culprit more times than not. Seriously it is maddening to try to figure out his mind and then try to connect it with his forgotten purchase. The worst was when he ordered a sweater embroidered with his family’s crest from a booth representing a store in Ireland at an Irish Fest in Buffalo NY. It’s name crunch came down to a wool and weaving mishmash. The sweater wasn’t wool it was cotton and the booth wasn’t showing weaving it was advertising the crest. It took days to figure it out, on top of having to listen to Gary say,” You have to be more careful when you buy things, always let me know so I can keep an eye out for it. Blah blah blah. …. ” When we finally figured out the right answer, Gary had to sheepishly apologize.
    The same routine happens with unrecorded checks. Unless it’s my hair stylist or therapist (thank God for him) I don’t write checks but I’m the first to be blamed but now checks are very easy to find where they went. The magazine companies have been doing the, don’t forget to renew, for years, even when you have 3 years left on the subscription. Live,love laugh, grumble, complain and laugh even more.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Jeff Salter says:

      I can just picture those conversations where Bailey is chastising you for your wanton spending. Would love to see the video of him apologizing later. Ha.
      Very good detective work on that sweater deal. You would “weave” those clues into a cool suspense novel.

      Like

  3. stevevanhorn says:

    Poor Annie. I think you broke her heart. lol Nice story! Thanks, Jeff!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Patricia Kiyono says:

    Now that hubby has learned the joys of online shopping, this is happening more. Fortunately, I have access to his email. A few weeks ago I went to the family room, where he was ensconced in his recliner, and asked why he had ordered a mural. He said he hadn’t. I showed him the email receipt. He said, “The only thing I’ve ordered recently is a ham.” I went to the website and showed him – he had ordered canvas print of a cartoonish frying pan with an egg and a slice of ham. I wonder where he plans to hang it.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Jeff Salter says:

      ROFL — he actually ordered a print of a ham and thought he was getting edible ham?
      That’s gotta be some pretty deceptive advertising… unless he was shopping in his sleep.

      Like

      • Patricia Kiyono says:

        His vision is getting worse. I’m sure he just read the caption (Boston Ham) and didn’t bother to read the description or look at the picture. He said when he called the company to cancel the order, the lady laughed at him. Serves him right!

        Liked by 1 person

  5. ROTFLOLACGU! Too funny. Arnie and I both do a lot of shopping online but we both keep records of what we’ve ordered. As far as looking back through the years, never. We never worry about things past the date of receiving the item. LOL That’s just asking for trouble.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Jeff Salter says:

      well, this was only reviewing the previous year’s credit card statements, so I could (hopefully) identify any deductible expenses to file with our tax return for that year (2014).
      And I quickly determined that Annie’s Pub would NOT be deductible. LOL

      Liked by 1 person

  6. That’s so funny. I’m not a fan of those reminders. They only need to send one, two at the most. There’s no need for constant reminders.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Jeff Salter says:

      And those urgent reminders are deliberately worded to make us believe we’re truly near the end of our current subscription. Whereas, they’re actually just tacking on additional years way into the future.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Kim Marcum says:

    Ha!!!! Love this story. By the way, my momma is Annie. And there’s a restaurant & pub by me called Ocean Annie’s. Yes, I too often abbreviate when logging purchases so I understand!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. jbrayweber says:

    Silly Jeff…
    Always with a great story to tell. Brings a smile in this time of uncertainty.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. trishafaye says:

    You win the Master Storyteller award with this one! I loved it, laughing my way through it.
    My only beef with Annie’s Publications is that Good Old Days has only accepted my submissions twice. I have many, many more that disappeared into the ether, never to be heard from again. Sign!
    With clear disclaimer – they were ‘As told to’ stories crediting my mom. I didn’t actually live through those days LOL (But close)

    Like

  10. Elaine Cantrell says:

    The last thing that threw me on a credit card bill was an item for a taxi in Australia. I’ve never been to Australia. We had to get that fixed right away.

    Liked by 1 person

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