Oh, Brother! Try This On For Size.

Question of the week, in this time of COVID:

Once it’s safe to do so, what’s the first thing you want to do that you haven’t been able to do in the last 10-12 months?

This is too easy: I want to visit my brother.

I think that all of us brought up visiting with family this week, which is no surprise, since we are all very family-centered people here.

My life has been quiet, especially after The Husband retired and I had some surgery a few years ago, when things got very quiet.

My grandkids grew to be teens and went to different schools, away from the ones near me. Even when one or two stayed here, it was quiet. It wasn’t the constant stream of friends of theirs as it was when their fathers were teens.

Even when they were older, my sons would bring guests in, and Son#2 would often bring in some from college to stay, but that has also been years now. That son has been moving around to other parts of the country, so no more of that; times like those will not come back.

I’ve seen The Grandkids, but not often. Our communication is down to basically text messaging and an occasional call. It drives me  NUTS, but beats no communication by a longshot.

My sister, a niece and another niece’s son live not far from me, but The Sister and I text and talk on the phone…a lot. My mother said that she started talking  very early and she never stopped. We stopped visiting for some reason. We drop things off with each other but never stay. My niece there has been unwell. Odd, but I can’t say that it is much different now than it has been for a number of years.

The other niece and her husband live out of town, yet we would often go out of the way when we would see my brother to visit her, and meet up with him, at the restaurant that she manages. We have not been able to do that since March.

My brother, as you no doubt know by now, is a troubled Vietnam vet. He has been unwell for some time. When he was living at home, he would run hot and cold about me, with little to no provocation. When my sister found herself unable to visit him as continually as she used to in the nursing home, (which has been 40+ miles from us), The Husband and I started making weekly trips there to stay and visit for around 3 hours. I’d take whatever he needed from home, (clothes, etc.), extra drinks, specialty foods, and one home-cooked meal.  The men would speak more than I would, (having more movies, geography and history in common). It also gave my brother less reason to find to be bothered by me, since we could never see his change toward me coming. We’d watch old westerns and he’d remember every minor bit player and what other movies or shoes that he had also seen them in, but he would also rewrite family history…and his own. He has no recollection of receiving a Purple Heart, let alone the battle and the injury. He doesn’t believe that it happened, even though he told my mother and me, which was one of the few times he spoke of battle.

Since March, we have been dropping off boxes for him, when we could. When he has to go to the hospital, he is put into quarantine and no boxes are allowed in. There was a few-month stoppage of all incoming boxes, which is kind of crazy, since the staff goes in and out and all of their supplies, food, linen, and anything else  you can think of is delivered. (They also keep the boxes away from the patients for a few days, so I can send no meal or perishable foods.)

I would also say that I’d like to go and get my hair done, but since I gave myself a better cut than all but two I have ever had, I can’t even say that I am champing at the bit anymore for that one.

What I really  could do with is doing some clothes shopping. Not being able to try things on has stopped me cold. It is difficult for me to find clothes that fit. Suffice it to say that for one good reason, (and one that I am not so happy about), the assumptions that if you gain weight, all of your body parts gain weight proportionately is a major misconception on the part of clothing designers/manufacturers. To get pants to fit in one area without being baggy in another is a real trial, (and tell me why they think that if those who wear an extra-large blouses, dresses and nightwear are all buxom?)

So, after visiting my brother, I am going quickly to go try on slacks!

I don’t know if I will be ready for the excitement.

About Tonette Joyce

Tonette was a once-fledgling lyricists-bookkeeper, turned cook/baker/restaurateur and is now exploring different writing venues,(with a stage play recently completed). She has had poetry and nonfiction articles published in the last few years. Tonette has been married to her only serious boyfriend for more than thirty years and she is, as one person described her, family-oriented almost to a fault. Never mind how others have described her, she is,(shall we say), a sometime traditionalist of eclectic tastes.She has another blog : "Tonette Joyce:Food,Friends,Family" here at WordPress.She and guests share tips and recipes for easy entertaining and helps people to be ready for almost anything.
This entry was posted in big plans, Daily life, decisions, experiences, Family, food, memories, shopping, Tonette Joyce. Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to Oh, Brother! Try This On For Size.

  1. Jeff Salter says:

    I hope the situation with your brother improves… and that y’all have less restricted access.
    I hate shopping and will put it off for months (or longer) until I simply have to get that new pair of shoes, or jeans, or whatever. And, yes, I totally understand that weight gain goes precisely where IT wishes… and not at all proportionately.


  2. Patricia Kiyono says:

    Hope you’re able to see your brother soon. My brothers and I are anxiously waiting to be able to visit our mom. She’s scheduled to get the vaccine in two weeks, and according to my county health department, I’ll be eligible soon, provided the doses are available – so there’s hope. I’ve always hated buying clothes, probably because nothing fits well, so like Jeff, I’ll shop for what I need when I absolutely need it, and if possible, I’ll use my sewing machine.

    Liked by 3 people

    • As I said to Jeff, I like shopping, but NOT for clothes. I am in real need. I lost a few from wearing-out and one decent pair last week by way of a bleach splattering. I haven’t made a blouse in a long time and I would not dare attempt pants.
      My hat is off to you.


  3. Clothes shopping is something I need to do as well. We have ordered a few things online but they either run a little snug or too big. I am looking forward to being able to try on some clothes.
    I hope you can see your brother soon.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I am upset that my reply did not post again.Thank you, Angie; I hope that I can get to see John soon, too
      I haven’t tried to order clothes in quite a while. My feet got too bad to order shoes; I had one company that had wonderful, affordable loafers, but that was many moons ago. I also used to get some blouses, but the quality was better back then. I tried to order a nightgown online a few years back but it was nothing like the picture, way too big and shoddily made. We need to get the factories back to America, for one thing.


  4. Elaine Cantrell says:

    I need clothes myself. Badly. I hope things get back to normal soon so we can do the things we love and see the people we love.


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