Line in the Sand, or Footprints?

“What is the bravest/scariest thing you have ever done?”

This is a hard one, as I thought of myself as a coward most of my life. However, I have come to realize that there are a few things that I have faced down, or plunged, into where I thought that I was needed. I have had to gird myself and step in to some very bad or odd situations, or take control.

Every time I have thought, “Oh, I don’t know how they /she/he did that, went through that, can handle that, I could not do it”, it has been as though God has said,

“Oh, yeah? Well, here it is; get through it.”

(It could also be “You can’t do/face it, but WE will”.)

One thing that I have learned in my life is that you can face or do anything if there are others, even one other person, depending on your action.

I wish that I could relate some of these matters to you here, but I find that I cannot. I cannot only because most of these involve others and it is not right for me to bring their personal lives to light.

I’ve been through a great deal; my life has not been easy. I have had to make quick, snap decisions that had potential of being life-altering for myself and others.

I could also tell you about some really strange things that have happened to or around me, things that I have lived with, seen or experienced, but there are always those who want to debunk them with normal, logical, with worldly explanations, and well honestly, you had to be there in those situations to understand or to accept them as real.

I wish that I had been braver earlier on in my life, as that would have altered a great deal of  my life and in the lives of others,

but then, I would have had a completely different life and maybe not as understanding as I am now. In fact, I know that I would not be. I now can almost always see why someone does something or why they are the way they are.

Life has been hard for a lot of people.

I grew up as a very good girl. I never did things that would get me into trouble. The biggest troubles that I had were that I found myself in the position of having to cover or care for people, and in situations caused by other people’s trouble-causing. I would be kept in the dark, ‘protected’ until something came crashing down and I found out everything at one time, and generally had to handle at least some of it. I got a bit bolder, and no one liked it. They expected a meek little thing who could be home and just wait for problems and handle them, but they also wanted a strong woman who used her talents and who could do just enough to clean it up a situation, but not strong enough to actually do anything to stop some from happening in the future.

During this time I found help in faith and the Church, which helped keep me going, and on a good path myself. I met a young man who was bolder than I but in pretty much the same position within his family. It took us years of on-again-off-again relationship, even after I moved halfway across the country, to decide to get move far from both families and marry, which was very brave for me. We never stopped taking on family responsibilities, however. Family was a call away, flights back and forth, or even some who came to live nearby,(or were sent to live with us).

There are many stories from both sides.

One story that I may be able to speak about is one that I have vaguely mentioned before. Once a few years ago, when leaving the funeral of a child, the string of cars leaving the cemetery came to a long halt. Someone that I knew came to the window and I asked what was going on. I was told that the child’s father and his ex-wife’s fiancé were fighting. I was not related to any of the people, but I leapt from the car. The person I was with asked what I was doing. All I knew is that it was up to me to stop the fight. When I got to the men, the father’s relatives and ‘friends’ were pushing him to physically fight, as were the other man’s ‘friends’. I elbowed my way to the middle between these fellows whom I barely knew, and told everyone to stop talking. Actually, I screamed at everyone to shut up. I held both of the guys at arm’s length and I told them to just stop. I loudly asked the people on both sides what the matter was with everyone. I told the fiancé to understand that no matter what, no matter how upset he himself was, the man had just buried his child, and told the fellow to leave. I ordered him to leave; I told him to go on, get out of there. He left. (I found out later he was missing for hours because he walked the whole 13 miles to the place they were staying.) I told the father to calm down and leave it alone, that his child would not want this.

I told everyone else that they should be ashamed of themselves and to go home.

No one, not one person there, tried to be a peacemaker. Everyone but a few thought that a fight was a good idea, and those who didn’t were just standing by or had simply walked away. I could have been assaulted by the men, but I felt like I was in more danger from the others, (the taunters, including the father’s mother), but like the cowardly bullies that they were, they backed down when I stood up to them.

I will never know what possessed me to jump into the middle of that, to put myself at risk. I don’t know why I knew that it was I who had to stop the fight, to stop someone from really getting hurt, and that I actually could do so. I had absolutely no doubt in my mind that it was my mission and that I would be successful.

The fight never resumed.

This was unusual for me. I did not grow up in a violent area. Although I cannot say that I was never struck or had never seen others struck, I had never been where people were so ready to physically fight or brag about it as they are here, (even the women, which never ceases to amaze me).

“Blessed are the peacemakers”; that crossed my mind only after I got back in the car to go home. I might have entered the Kingdom of Heaven at the hands of the crowd, but then, maybe it was another example of  “Footprints in the Sand”.