My Kingdom for a Pair of Glasses (Each Morning)
By Jeff Salter
First of all, Happy Thanksgiving! I hope all of us are thankful for the many blessings we already have… and not terribly dismayed at those we do not have (at least not at this point).
Missing Things
This true story (originally posted on FB in 2016) comes to mind this week because we’ve been looking for several missing items around our household. Foremost is my wife’s key fob thingy for her SUV. Another item I’ve searched for is a book I know I purchased within the past 18 months or so… but cannot locate ANYWHERE. We also searched, for hours, for one of my hex keys (size 3/32, if you’re interested)… to no avail. It seems we misplace – sometimes only temporarily, but a few apparently forever – items we value that can’t be replaced. Eyeglasses seem to appear on that “missing-in-action” list quite often.
For those of you who appreciate irony:
Stumbled around one morning for nearly 10 minutes looking for my glasses. I say “stumbled” because I’m totally wasted – zombie status – until I get my coffee.
Normally, my glasses are on the bathroom counter, which is the second base I touch every single morning.
Nope, not there. So I looked in my study. Nope.
I look all around the bedroom. Nope.
Getting frustrated… not to mention that I haven’t started my coffee yet.
I re-check the bathroom counter and examine the bathroom floor (since our cat sometimes plays hockey with the stuff on the counter).
Nope.
Finally I give up and head to the kitchen to make my coffee “blind” (as it were)… without my tri-focals.
Wanna guess where my glasses were?
Yep. Right in front of the coffee maker.
The coffee maker is the third base I touch each morning… and I would’ve been there nine minutes sooner, except that I’d been looking for my glasses.
Question:
What about YOU? Do you keep misplacing items? For example?
[JLS # 617]
Angela Schroeder
Patricia Kiyono
Elaine Cantrell
Jeff Salter
Joselyn
Tonette Joyce
Four Foxes, One Hound 
All the time, Jeff… all the time. I use a walking stick sometimes. It’s a White Mountain version of a sheleighleigh. Most days, I don’t need it, but sometimes my knee acts up or my hip, and then I really need it. I use it on occasion for vertigo as well. My need for it will dissipate while I’m doing something, and that’s where it will be left behind. Arnie says he’s going to put a beeper on it. LOL In my own defense, He loses his glasses, phone, keys (need I go on), etc., all the time.
Shoes are another thing that go AWOL a lot, since I hate wearing shoes, but sometimes need them depending on where I want to walk.
You’re not alone, my friend. 🙂
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If we ever locate Denise’s car key, we’re gonna try to find a tracker to affix to it.
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Look in the washing machine. LOL
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we even checked the fridge
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I’ll bet it’s in the pocket of something she wore the last time she used it.
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My problem is that I put things in a safe place, then months/years later I can’t remember where the safe place was. 🙂
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Exactly! We select places so “safe” that they’re safe even from our future re-discovery.
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My glasses are something that I misplace very often. I only need them for reading and so when I get up off the computer, I realize that I don’t need them when I am generally halfway to the kitchen, so I put them down ….and then have no idea where I put them.It was particularly bad two pair ago when I got clear frames; those things were chameleons and blended in wherever I put them. I would look straight past them, or even at them,and never focus in on them. The last ones had teal frames and were easier to find than the ones I have now, which are black, and also seem to blend in.
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I envy people who need only reading glasses.
Denise — since her eye surgery — fits into that category and she loses her readers all the time. At any given point, there are half a dozen pair scattered around the household.
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I have many reader-cheaters all over, too: the bathrooms and kitchen for labels, the book and movie shelves for checking titles,(several places) and the bedside for reading,(although those are generally Rx, too.)
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Yep… I’ve told Denise we should buy them by the dozen.
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LOL, you aren’t the only one to misplace things. I’ve hidden Christmas gifts and never found them.
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me, too. In fact, when I later discover such things, I sometimes can’t even remember purchasing it!
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My mom often misplaces her glasses only to have it pointed out that they’re on her head or on the table next to her. She probably should wear them all the time but only wears them for reading.
The thing I misplace the most is my phone or the remote for the tv. Often the remote is under the sleeping dog.
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under the dog —- maybe the glasses are there also
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It’s possible. The dog just sits on whatever is in his way.
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