“Socially” Acceptable

I thought of the topic of the week, “How do you use social media and how has it changed”, when I found myself on one platform more and more, one that I never expected to connect with folks through: 


Looking back, I realize that had social media been common in 1990, I would have connected so well and meetings, conventions, and groups would have been so easy, instead of the mailed newsletters, phone calls, and messages that I had to leave. 

 But I didn’t get on until the late-mid1990s and I was away from nearly all of the groups and organizations which had taken my time, nor were many of the folks I knew online. 

I exchanged emails with people, but after a few years photos and news of many friends and extended family stopped coming. When I would enquire, I’d get “Oh I have all of that up on Facebook.” I did not want to go there, but I did, and found a new world. 

Facebook has saved my sanity. I connect with old friends, family and people around the world whom I would never have known. It is no secret that I have never found a niche here. To be completely frank, I have seldom found those with whom I can truly communicate wherever I have been, but in most places, there were more folk to have more of a chance and more activities in which to find them. The intellectual and social benefits of the employment that brought us here shriveled, then our work, schedules, and family life got complicated, so socially, we lost a lot of opportunity for interaction and finding of like minds. 

Most people know that I have two FB accounts. One is for thinkers with whom I may not always agree, but keep a civil tongue and kind heart. The other is for ‘People Collectors’, those who find out that I am  on FB and insist on ‘friending’ me. Most are Locals, so it is awkward to turn them down. Many are former coworkers, some were Scouters, some are in-laws and some are disapproving family members who don’t always appreciate my humor or some opinions of others on my other page.  

I was on MySpace for sometime years ago and found it helpful. I reconnected with a celebrity whom I had met when I was a kid. He came to my home with a family friend and was very kind to me when I needed it. As expected, he did not remember the encounter but was glad to find that when he thought that he had been a self-centered young man, he had a spark of kindness within himself. When I caught up with him, he was living in South Africa. How would I ever have seen him except with social media? He came back to the States and we message once in a while. He had a bad bout with Covid two years ago but came through, and I was so glad to offer a small amount of support back to him.   

I would have continued wondering whatever happened to him. This is not the only time that I get to tell someone how much a small gesture made in my life, or a story that related to them or a loved one. 

 I love social media for those opportunities. 

However, nearly everyone has abandoned MySpace.  I can’t say that I did not have my reasons, but it was a nice platform for me for a while. 

I have never understood the use of Twitter.  They limited how many words you could use and it is now generally crazy opinion after opinion and rants, and, well, I dislike it. 

I have an Instagram account but  I don’t find it very useful. Some folks abandoned Facebook and went to Instagram and that is how I keep in a minute amount of touch with them, especially one second- cousin, with whom I am determined to remain connected, (I text on holidays and his  birthday; he is connected on one platform with Son#1, but they no longer have much in common.)  

I find Instagram frustrating because my phone keeps telling me that I have notifications or unseen posts, yet they seem always to be ones that I have seen. When I get on specific people’s, I see that I missed notifications. 

Others, especially The Grandkids, have moved to Snapchat. They speak to each other and many friends that way; I am not among those chosen people, although they do talk and text to me.  
I don’t even bother with it. 

I used to connect through a number of blogs; I still do with some.  Although my own entertaining and cooking blog is often-neglected, I still communicate or see posts from ‘old’ friends, people who have like interests and still blog.  Most of those are foodies and writers, but many have fallen away. 
I imagine that they usually think that my blog has also disappeared, but when someone wants a recipe or needs info, I can send them straight to a post that I put up with what they need. 

What really prompted this post was when it dawned on me that in the mornings I check the ‘family email’ account, then my personal email, and I found that I often check in on YouTube messages before I hit Facebook or here. 

On YouTube can connect with like-minded people or those who have information, (or those with whom I share information), in comments. Again, there are people around the world with ideas, how-tos, music, stories, books, writing, items I didn’t know existed, and even recipes or nutritional information with whom I can interact. 

I never expected that. 

My Grandkids tell me to ‘vlog’ recipes, information, and techniques, or even reviews, but I have no desire to make videos. 

I will watch, or listen and comment, and get into live group chats occasionally. I get information, I give information. In the last week, I told someone near the train derailment how to get her well water tested, I told someone else in another state how to ‘season’ her cast iron pans, another how to choose where to live to avoid floods, someone in England about using Quorn, (and more).  

I learned more about weather in the last month than I had in many years and mind you, I was a trained ‘weather-watcher’. Before doppler, the Weather Service office in Louisville would call me for updates out here, and I would phone in flooding and sudden storms. They official issued USWF warnings on my information.  

I know there is more, but I won’t bore you more than I may have. I know that if I get a question or remark there directing me to a “Whatsapp” address, it’s a troll. I’ve never been near that one.
(Have any of you used Whatsapp?)  

I’ve been to Pinterest, I have an account, but never posted. Honestly, it’s a rabbit hole and I have not been there in years, to be honest. 

If it were not for Facebook and other outlets, let’s just say that I might have had more in common with certain postal workers than would be healthy. 


About Tonette Joyce

Tonette was a once-fledgling lyricists-bookkeeper, turned cook/baker/restaurateur and is now exploring different writing venues,(with a stage play recently completed). She has had poetry and nonfiction articles published in the last few years. Tonette has been married to her only serious boyfriend for more than thirty years and she is, as one person described her, family-oriented almost to a fault. Never mind how others have described her, she is,(shall we say), a sometime traditionalist of eclectic tastes.She has another blog : "Tonette Joyce:Food,Friends,Family" here at WordPress.She and guests share tips and recipes for easy entertaining and helps people to be ready for almost anything.
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6 Responses to “Socially” Acceptable

  1. jbrayweber says:

    I love Pinterest. Though to be honest, I haven’t been there in a while. I’m a visual person, so for me, it’s a great place to pin story/place/character inspiration. I’ve also pinned recipes, DIY projects, party and costume ideas for my kids, and so much more.

    You are right, it’s a rabbit hole.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Jeff Salter says:

    I’m pretty sure I opened an account on MySpace, some years ago, but only dabbled with it long enough to secure some particular info I needed, and then never gave it another thought.
    I’m intrigued by your use of YouTube as a communication platform. I visit various destinations within YouTube fairly often, but don’t recall ever communicating with anyone or anything therein. What I’ve accessed has mainly been music clips or TV skits, or maybe interviews.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I know, right? I’ve been watching or listening to a great deal on YouTube for years, (more and more so over the last two), but when I realized how much communicating I had been doing with others there, it prompted this topic.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Elaine Cantrell says:

    I agree with you about Twitter. I’ve never used Snap Chat or Instagram before. I don’t really have much of a desire to. I have a cast iron frying pan that I’ve tried so many times to preseason. I used Southern Living’s “recipe” which is just about that I found on the Lodge website. Nothing fixed the issue. Oh well, back to YouTube.

    Liked by 1 person

    • OK, Elaine, let’s try to fix your pan! Here’s what worked for my older and new pans:
      Clean thoroughly; dry thoroughly and place in a 200F oven for 15 minutes. Remove the pan, and turn the temp up to 300. Cover the pan with vegetable shortening, then immediately rub as much of it off as you can; DO NOT LET THE GREASE PUDDLE IN THE PAN. The heat will expand the pan more each time and allow the shortening to become embedded in the metal. Return to the oven for 15 minutes. Remove, crank the heat up to 400, and repeat the putting on and rubbing off of the shortening. (Be VERY careful; use silicon gloves or hot pads.) Let the pans cool completely in the oven. Repeat, if you think it needs it. I did a new set of cheaper pans three times, (3 sets of times for myself and a friend.)


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