Great Parents … and Terrific Role Models
By Jeff Salter
This week’s topic concerns what (about our parents) we are grateful for.
It would be too difficult to attempt to put this in any particular order (of importance), so I’ll just start listing:
* They taught me frugality; I learned the meaning of “no” and usually understood it was because our family income could not stretch far enough to constantly hear “yes”.
* Our family of five survived on a single income of a minister’s salary (which, at that time, was less than starting school teachers made). We didn’t have any frills, but we never went hungry.
* Both taught me to appreciate fine arts: music, visual art, literature.
* As a kid, I had a lot of freedom to roam and play and – as long as I didn’t get into trouble somewhere else – there were relatively few restrictions.
* I was taught to treat people fairly, with as little pre-judging as possible.
* I learned consequences for when I broke rules.
* I had chores to do – inside and out – and was not usually bribed to do them.
* My parents knew (or got to know) my school teachers and kept up with my grades and such, but they NEVER did my school work “for” me. Those were my classes and I had to do all the course work.
* Both parents encouraged my own creative expressions — whether visual arts, music, or creative writing.
* Neither parent “compared” me to my older brother (a straight A student) or my younger sister. Both of them possessed musical talent and discipline.
* My friends were welcome in our home.
* My parents took me to church when I was little and encouraged me to continue when I was older, but I never felt like religion was being crammed down my throat.
* My Dad was a fairly liberal Democrat and my Mom was a fairly conservative Republican … and I was allowed to get myself informed and make my own decisions.
* I was never pushed to attend a particular university, or select a particular career field… but when I made each of those decisions, my parents supported them.
* Both parents accepted and loved my spouse… and accepted and loved my kids. My Dad only lived long enough to meet my first grandchild, but likewise for that next generation.
* When I was young and gave my parents little 25 cent gifts at Christmas, they made me feel very appreciated.
My list could continue, but I think you get the idea.
What were YOUR parents like?
Angela Schroeder
Patricia Kiyono
Elaine Cantrell
Jeff Salter
Joselyn
Tonette Joyce
Four Foxes, One Hound 
I love the recurring theme of support that they showed you – that would be one thing I could easily say about my parents, even if they didn’t like my decision, they supported me!
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yes, Kate. and I’ve tried to follow that theme with my kids. Whatever choices they made needed to be their choices… not my wishful thinking.
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Sounds like a lovely childhood, Jeff and great parents.
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If I could go back in time and alter aspects of it, I’d probably do away with all the “hand-me-down” clothing that never fit properly. And I would have added air-conditioning to the house before my senior yr in HS. But most of the rest was pretty OKAY.
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I enjoyed the blog! Made me think of my own parents and grandparents who raised me. We were lucky back then and never really realized it until we grew up. I feel sorry for those youngsters today who have no clue what all that could mean to them.
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Thanks, Debbie. Yes, I also worry about the generations which followed mine. Of everything that faces the current youngsters, I think the most harmful are: (1) that they never have any roaming time because of all the legitimate concerns over their safety, (2) that too many are given too much, too soon, and many don’t appreciate those gifts and never understand the relationship between work and gain.
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My dad worked a lot of hours as a store manager for Kmart, Mom was a stay-at-home Mom until I was 14. Grades were very important in our house, you didn’t have to make straight A’s, but you had to show you were doing your best. Creativity was encouraged. Discipline came in the form of spankings, followed by a long talk about why the spanking occurred and reinforcement of their love for us….after age 10 discipline came in the form of groundings. Because of my dad’s hard work, we had everything we needed and most of what we wanted, but we were aware that all we had was made possible by Dad’s hard work. Compassion was taught heavily to us in the form of charitable work. Many of our Thanksgiving dinners were shared with some of my father’s employees who were too far away from their families. We were expected to behave in public at all times and show manners….and we did. My parents did not believe in baptizing children into a particular religion just because it is what the parents were. They believed your relationship with God, is just that, YOUR relationship with God. We attended different churches over the years and then we were baptized, as adults, according to what religion we felt closest to, myself and one of my sister’s are Episcopalian and my youngest sister is Baptist. There was always a lot of laughter in our house. My parents would still slay dragons for us.
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A beautifully written tribute, Elissa, to your folks. Sounds like a terrific family to grow up in.
Glad you could visit today… and thanks for commenting.
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That’s a beautiful post, Jeff.
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thanks, Helen. Glad you could visit today
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Got ya some great parents, Jeff.
Mine were/are great, too.
I was taught love, respect, manners, loyalty, laughter, all things good. I was also taught how to fight, how to deal with nasty people, and how to deal with disappointment. I felt loved and safe. And I had an amazing childhood, even when I thought it sucked as a teen (but don’t all teenagers think this?). They let me push my boundaries, while helping me stay grounded. It’s difficult to put into words how I feel about them. I have a deep respect for my parents, even for their flaws. I am a lucky, lucky daughter.
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wonderful tribute, Jenn.
And I’ll bet you were a firecracker as a teen…
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I think my parents were cut from the same cloth as yours, Jeff. Neither of my parents were strong in their faith, but dad took us to church every Sunday until I turned 16. Then he handed me the keys and said, “If you want to continue going, you can take the car every Sunday morning.” Education was stressed, always. We weren’t rewarded for good grades, they were EXPECTED. It was assumed we would go to college and begin a career. And when I married someone they wouldn’t have chosen (not only was he white, with bright blue eyes and curly hair, he was a divorced father of three!), they came to accept him as well as his children.
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yeah, Patty, my folks did expect good grades from me — and I was a solid B or B+ student. But thankfully they didn’t shove me to attain that Straight A Valedictorian route that my big brother took.
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